How splendid\u00a0is your beard among the nations The people\u00a0gaze with wonder, Oh chin\u00a0of chins, oh beard of beards, Shave not\u00a0your beard, Great is\u00a0the bearded one. Written in 1997<\/em><\/p>\n Lover<\/em><\/p>\n My love you are beautiful, Beloved<\/em><\/p>\n Oh gorgeous man, you are like a bat to me – Lover<\/em><\/p>\n I love you cute girl, Beloved<\/em><\/p>\n Right. Your beard is like a jungle Where has my lover gone? Lover<\/em><\/p>\n I am here, you silly cow. Beloved<\/em><\/p>\n Oh my lover, Written in 2002<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" The Beardy Psalm How splendid\u00a0is your beard among the nations How awesome is its length; Its breadth defies all knowledge. Can my chin attain to such greatness? Can it be as hairy as yours? Selah The people\u00a0gaze with wonder, In reverence they stroke their chins. Not so the shaven – They are like the young, …read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":26,"menu_order":1,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":[],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/jamesots.com\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/35"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/jamesots.com\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/jamesots.com\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jamesots.com\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jamesots.com\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=35"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/jamesots.com\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/35\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":362,"href":"https:\/\/jamesots.com\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/35\/revisions\/362"}],"up":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jamesots.com\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/26"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/jamesots.com\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=35"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jamesots.com\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=35"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\nHow awesome is its length;
\nIts breadth defies all knowledge.
\nCan my chin attain to such greatness?
\nCan it be as hairy as yours?
\nSelah<\/em><\/p>\n
\nIn reverence they stroke their chins.
\nNot so the shaven –
\nThey are like the young,
\nWhose chins know not hair
\nAnd cannot aspire to such beardiness.<\/p>\n
\nYour facial hair flows like a stream.
\nThe goats of Aberystwyth gather at its banks to graze.
\nThe mountain doves nest in its crevaces,
\nAnd the water rats find solace in its warmth.<\/p>\n
\nLet not me see your face clearly.<\/p>\n
\n(His beard endures forever).<\/p>\nSong of Sidney<\/h2>\n
\nLike six oxen you charge through the fields.
\nCome to me my darling,
\nLeap like a frog over the walls surrounding my house.<\/p>\n
\nYour wings flap like flapping things.
\nYour stomach is like a tummy
\nEver so lovely.<\/p>\n
\nYour apples are like melons,
\nYour hair is like long bits of string
\nAnd your legs are like twin mountain baboons.<\/p>\n
\nAnd you nose hair is like weeds
\nThat grow unkempt in a shrubbery.
\nYour bottom is like the moon.<\/p>\n
\nI phone him on his mobile
\nBut he does not answer.
\nI wander round town in my nightie looking for him.<\/p>\n
\nI was downstairs watching the footy.
\nAnd thinking about your lovely feet,
\nThey are like bunches of bananas to me.<\/p>\n
\nWhy did you not do the washing up?
\nGet up you lazy old goat
\nWho bounds through the leafy glades of the night.<\/p>\n